Vol 104

Something I realized recently.
In context of size and complexion, while people may think I'm the lucky one, in reality I am not.
At least I never saw it that way.
I'm skinny. As simple as that.
Better yet, in the words of...everyone, I'm tiny.
I'm that stick figure uncurvy one.
At least I am for a black girl.
To my non-black friends, I'm shapely. *rolls eyes*
But despite my size, no matter where I look, on TV or in novels, there is never someone similar to me.
There is always the girl with the ample breast, shapely rear, thick thighs, hips, etc...or the outright BBW.
There might be a "fit" character, but never a skinny one.
Not unhealthy skinny. Just naturally small.
I eat more than any women and most men, but on a bad day I'm still a size 3.
And the more I eat, the smaller I get.
I'm not taking about eating salads and wheat thins.
Those are good, but give me something deep fried and smothered in chocolate.
I hardly ever work out either.
There is no need.
When I do, it's for muscle tone, not to lose weight.

On to another black person thing.
TV has an steady supply of their brown women.
Not dark.
Not even light.
Just brown.
And is that fair?
Where are the dark beauties or the high yellow ladies?
I'm curious.
I'm a high yellow, but I'm actually curious about where the dark beauties are?
There's all over the place in novels, but besides the two or three popular actresses, where are the others?
I know people think lighter is better and that's just foolish.
Things like this...I notice but it never really means anything until it stands out a lot.
I'm so immune to things like race that I only notice it when it really stands out or someone points it out.
Well, these are things that are starting to stand out as someone pointed them out.

And as the high yellow, skinny chick, I'm suppose to remain quiet.
My friends look at me and say what right do I have to complain?
But I have just as much a right as any other.

Things like this should mean nothing, yet they do.
Instead of big girls targeting me or me targeting them, we should all target those who say one is better than the other.

This isn't just a black thing.
Other people have it as well.
The tall vs the short.
Blond hair vs Red
Blue/Green eyes vs Brown.
It's annoying and rather petty, don't you think?

Everyone has their complexes, right?
Why make fun of someone because they're different?
Doesn't that just show how insecure you may be?
That's how I see it.
It's hilarious to see how many things really keep people divided.
(Not me. I accept everyone...or almost everyone. I don't like smelly people)
Things that don't matter.
Things that only a .1 percent gene difference determines.
Stuff that are measure by letters and numbers.
It just shows how silly people are.
(Again, not me. I accept everyone, except smelly people. And people who steal my stuff)
You want to know how accepting I am.
Right now I'm watching Ninja Assassin.
This movie is utterly, completely, terrible.
It sucks.
Majorly.
But I'm watching it because I'm accepting, and I think that Bi Rain is some smexy, Asian, eye candy.
Man, he can move.
They trained him hard for this role.
He looks nice.
His short hair is better though.
(Don't you agree Tia?)
See! See how accepting I am.
Want another example?
I stayed up all last night watching Lord of the Rings?
Not just because Legolas is slice raisin bread, which I love more than plain old slice bread, and not because Aragon is one of the hottest older men alive, but because of Liv Tyler's role as Arwen.
I adored her.
...I guess these aren't good examples. ;)
Well I can say that no matter where I am, work, school, outside, I have never treated anyone differently because of things that were predetermined and out of their control.
Now, I will openly admit that I am a rude bitch when it comes to one type of person.
And that's a pervert.
My tongue is sharp and I rip them to shreds.
The life choices they make are inhumane and I can't stand that.
My point is that whether you're white, black, hispanic, asian, fat, skinny, tall, short, blue hair, blond eyes, (lol), any so on, I don't and won't treat you differently.
I treat you all the same.
Like a bunch of annoying ass relatives.


Psst!
Whatever.
Time to get back to my novel that has a BBW as the main character.
(Her friend makes me want to punch her in the face. She's a bigot in denial. Why is it always the light skin, skinny ones portrayed this way? *smh*)

You know, one of my favorite novels is a romance novel whose main character is only 5 feet 1.
I've yet to see a story where the character was I size 2-3.

I should stop rambling now.
I have to wake up for work in less than 5 hours.
Insomnia is a biznitch.

Vol 103

When 23 year old orphaned, virgin, Royal meets I-have-no-clue-how-old-either-29-or-39-but-lets-go-with-39 year old Dmitry, all her prayers are answered.
What Dmitry offers the black, beautiful, recent college graduated is too good to be true...Well, because it is.
He offers her a job to complete run and manage his new clothing store with a 60K salary, an apartment, tons of expensive gifts and even a chauffeur.
Sounds unbelievable right?
It is.
Because what Royal doesn't know about Dmitry is that he's actually a Russian Mafia boss.
Oh snap!
But Dmitry and Royals love-love relationship sails while, with the occasional interruption, until a vindictive brother comes along with the plot to kill Dmitry.

I haven't finished the book yet. I'm about a third of the way through.
I stumbled across it last night while doing my nightly book search on Amazon for kindle books.
This is a little different from my normal read.
I tend to stay away from crime novels.
My conscience is to open for this type of book.
It makes it hard to sleep at night because I over think things.
But I actually look forward to reading this series.
I know Dmitry's book is first, not sure who is second, but Anatoly's novel comes on later this month.
He's a quiet one, but his silence is LOUD!
And I just love the silent yet deadly types.
When they're not silent and deadly with me.


Edit: Oh god!
I'm at the first kill scene.
I wonder who the leak is.
Will find out in 2 sentences.
*shudders*

(10 seconds later) Edit 2:
COLD. BLOOD.ED
Anatoly is scary.
tsk tsk tsk

(2 minutes after that) Edit 3:
Nuh uh Dmitry.
You're slipping.
And your boys noticed.
Better check yourself at the door next time.

(1 minute later) Edit 4:
Cory and Renee, for your own safety, SHUT UP!

(4 minutes later) Edit 5:
Ivan is such an ass!
Damn, I want to punch him in the face.

(23 seconds later) Edit 6:
I've never been so happy to see Anatoly in my life.
I can almost cry.

(2 more minutes later) Edit 7:
I'm still only a third into the book, and this is getting tense.

(Side note comment) Edit 8:
Someone, please, get Cory out of the middle of this gun/stare off.

(5 minutes later) Edit 9:
Wow! Never stand between a Russian Mafia boss and his little, young, black, girlfriend.
People die.
*shaking my head*

(shortly afterward) Edit 10:
Royal, if you truly love the man and want to stay with him despite it all, you can.
No one is blaming you.
But please honey, stop being fucking naive.
You know he's Mafia.
Renee and Cory even voiced their opinion that he's Mafia.
Cory is too...adamant.
Yet you still deny it.
*smh* Don't let all the money and fancy lifestyle blind you.
It could be gone in a flash.

(15 minutes later) Edit 11:
NO!
I'm afraid.
I don't want to read anymore.
I have a really bad feeling about this next part.
Nooooo!
Please. Please. Please.
I'm going to cry if something happens to him.

(One second later) Edit 12:
WHAT! I knew it!
I knew it. I knew it. I knew it.
I said he was a little to brave for...well, him.
tsk tsk tsk
Still like him though.
Even if he's a sneaky.

(meanwhile) Edit 13:
Anatoly.
He's a very intimidating kid.
I'll call him a kid, because despite his cold demeanor and scary approach, he's only 20. Maybe 21 by now.
Point is, he's someone I would hesitate to approach, but never back down from.
That's the only way you'd get his respect.
...But probably the fastest way to have him shoot you.

(About an hour later) Edit 14:
Wait! WHAT?
Dmitry...Cory...
Now this I did not expect.
I was panting with worry just now.
But really Cory, make a choice.
You can't have the best of both worlds.

(Even later) Edit 15:
Freaking out is completely understandable, Royal.
I agree with you.
Screaming and fighting is what any sane person would have done.
Stabbing...yep.
Still agree.
Easily forgiving...not so much.

(Finally finished:) Edit 16:
No matter what you say Royal, I would have like to see Ivan suffer tremendously.
He got off way too easily.
ENTIRELY TOO EASY!
Poor Royal.
At least she still has Dmitry.

Glad that's over with.
*I'm getting ansty over Anatoly's book.
Can't wait.
Hopefully his book will be properly edited.
I mean seriously, there were a hell of a lot of SPaG issues in this story.
I understand Dmitry's and Anatoly's habit of skipping over words.
English isn't their first language.
But even Royal would do it or you'll find missing words in the narration.
Rather annoying really.
And the kindle format had a tendency to smashwordstogetherlikethis.
That's just hard to read.
But I can only fault the grammar so much.
My own stories are terrible.
You should see the hard edit I've been working on for one.
The entire paper is red marked.

Even with all that, I still loved this.
I mean, I've read tons and tons of IR romance novels.
But this one is definitely one of my favorites.
Top 3 after Tammy William's Choices and Blindsided.
The thing I liked most was Royal.
I'm so sick and tired of reading stories with black female characters and not relating to them at all.
Granted, I'm not an orphan or have shot a man before, but Royal and I are a year apart, and some of the things that she feels I understand.
She has an innocence to her that I relate to.
I grew up in the hood, but I have morals and goals.
Her self respect was off the hook.
You go Royal.
You don't find many female leads like that.

NEXT!
Lets go Anatoly.
I pray his fight with his cousin is better than the fight between Ivan and Dmitry.
God I wish I could torture Ivan.
*Yes Yes. I'm a little protective over Royal. So what*

Tía, you know I'm sending this to you, don't you?
Lets enjoy the Russian's together.


Side note:
I know a bit of Russian.
But that's no surprise.
I know a bit of over 8 languages.
I wonder if Latrivia speaks Russian or if she had to research it for this novel....?

Vol 102

I have been up for over 24 hours, and I have never been more energetic.
That is all thinks to Jill Mansell and Millie's Fling.

Now, I'm a girl of humor.
If you can't make me laugh, you suck at life.
If you can make me laugh...rock on!
And man oh man, did Jill having me laughing from 12:30am to 11am.
(Yes, I'm that slow a reader, but this novel was freakishly long.)

A lot of reviews, although score this with extremely high marks, don't do justice to this book.
Me, I like when the characters in the beginning are also in the end.
I don't like when you introduce me to Billy and Mandy and by the end of the story it'll be Mandy and Dave, or Billy and Susan.
It's annoying.
I usually fall for the characters I first meet, and I'd like the see those same characters at the end.

Well, Mansell did a fantastic job with characterization in this novel.
Besides Hester, who was annoying flawed in a realistic way, almost all the characters were lovable.
Except that cheating snake Gile...Gail...whatever his name was, and his mistress.

Anyway, the story starts off with Millie's at-the-time boyfriend proposing that they move in together.
But she wasn't listening to him at all, her intention focused on the would-be suicidal victim contemplating jumping of a cliff.
She ends up taking the lady out of it, Orla, a famous romance novel.
As a consequence, that boyfriend left her stranded on the cliff.

I'm going to say that the story has two starts.
Start one is when Millie and Hester find a wallet.
They search the wallet to find out who it belonged to.
Finding a cell number in the wallet, Millie calls it and plays a joke that goes horrible wrong and leaves her with an enormous amount of guilt.
She apologizes, but still feels guilty.

A few days later, guilt even stronger than before, Millie's house phone bill arrives.
Relief, the number she had forgot, she now can get from the bill and call.
But she starts off with another joke, this one landing her with a not-a-date-just-to-be-clear.

The second start of the story is when Orla decides she's going to write her next novel with a different approach.
It'll be realistic, about real people. real life situations, and Millie is her start, with Hester, Lucas, and a few others as subplots.
Millie warns Orla that her life is rather boring, but no fear...Orla has a well of innocently manipulating everything.

As much as I want to, I won't tell the story.
I'll just say, LUCAS IS THE GREATEST EVER!
What little scenes he has, he leaves you with an impression.
A serious impression.
What he did to Hester...there isn't a character alive who can ravel that move.
I screamed with laughter for 10 whole minutes.
And this was at 6:30am.
I adored him.
Seriously.
Really.
Best character alive.
Con as well.
But mainly Lucas.
And of course Hugh, who was an absolutely doll, even with that jackass of a move he pulled.
Millie was such an easy-going normal girl...with cheap shoes.
But her father and Judy as fantastic.
Her mom...not so much.
Her mother was really the most annoying character around.

There are some clapping moment in this story.
Orla's scorned wife scene was great.
I had to clap for her.
Her shocked-utterly attracted to the enemy scene as well.
She was such a lovely person.
She didn't deserve any of the stuff her husband put her through.

Lucas also has a few scenes.
His reputation as a playboy is widely known, but when he actually shows morals and give sound advice...*claps*
He's so full of himself.
What he does TO Hester FOR Hester...as hilarious as it was...*claps*

And despite Hugh's total asshole scene, he makes you squirm in a good way.
Never once did I feel bad for his situation.
He's not the type of character who would accept pity.
He was so light, airy, and found humor in everything.
Which was great because he turned all of Millie's embarrassing scenes into humor for her.
Especially the second phone conversation.

Anyway, being up for 27 hours now is starting to kick in.
I can't remember what I was going to type next besides, GO READ IT!
Yes, YOU!
You're know I'm taking specifically to you.

Vol 101

So cool.
My printer can print in book format.
It prints in landscape format, two pages on each page.
It kind of confused me because it printed all the old numbers.
So pages 3 and 5 were on one page, 7 and 9 on the next.
It said to take the pages out, keep them in the order they're in and reinsert them back into the print tray.
Then it prints all the end pages.
In the end, you get double sided, booklet like prints.
Cool.
I stapled it together.
:P

Vol 100

Me and the robot man in Uptown New York.


Anyway, I added a new wedget.
It's so I can TRY to keep a total of how much I spent on books already.
It's only day two of the new year and I've spent $41.
HA!

Vol 99

Vol 98

For the first time, when the east coast is struck with a blizzard, Baltimore is not effected.
Yet here I am in New York, surrounded by two plus feet of snow.
I should have stayed home, but no...I wanted to come hang with my okaasan, who I haven't saw in a year, in my otousan.
But okaasan's flight was cancelled, so no her.
Sucks.
Doesn't matter.
I'm leaving a day early anyway.
I would have left today, but I want to take the train home.
The five hour bus ride (it's never 5 hours long) was enough to deter me from taking it back.
You should have saw the traffic heading South bound from New York.
I tell no lies when I say that traffic was moving slowly between Baltimore and Delware, and was at a complete standstill from Newark NJ to Manhattan.
Complete standstill.


Anyway, one of the things we had planned was to see the newest Disney princess movie, Tangled a.k.a Rapunzel.
Chloe and I went to see it yesterday.
That movie was freaking awesome.
7 songs too many, but other than that, I've never laughed so hard at a Disney movie.
Seriously.
That movie was hilarious.
Had some very cheesy moments.
So cheesy I had to cringe.
But it was great.
The best characters were Max, the horse, and Pascal, the chameleon.
They were...*laughs*
Max was more dog than horse.
Pascal was more protective older brother/best friend than chameleon.
And Flynn and his smolder...PRICELESS.
I didn't think the Witch/Mom/Whoever was all that bad.
Yeah, she was wrong for kidnapping Rapunzel, but she treated her well.
Besides the no going outside part.
She could have just locked her away and tormented her, but she didn't.

Mah...anyway...
I need to go get ready soon.
Have a long day ahead of me.